twenty seven.

A birthday letter to you on the day that officially honors all things worth celebrating: ice cream, cookies, honesty, and you. I can't think of a better combination.

BF,

I'm not sure I even know where to begin.

You've been such a steady, constant, pillar of strength and understanding in my life - even, and maybe especially, when you don't feel that you are.

You encourage me, inspire me, and dare me to be better with your own passionate commitment to doing life well.

You, my (older and wiser) friend, teach me, challenge me, strengthen, support, and pray for me.

Without fail, you've always been there for me when I needed you. Regardless of the number of times we've missed phone calls and failed to return voicemails, the times that it has really mattered you've been the one that was there.

You, in your love for your friends, have illustrated well a grace-filled, Christ-like love and steadfastness that I count myself blessed daily to be on the receiving end of.

You are humble and loving, courageous, adventurous, and independent.

And the way that you live with a zeal for life is contagious. You see beauty in people, places, and things. Through your patient listening ear and artistic eye behind a camera, or in your unswerving determination and desire to live and love well, you are able to draw out the best in what you see. Maybe this is what I love most about you.

We've come a long way from sneaking out of Double X , prancing around in our Fembot capes, and living the carefree and amazing life of teenagers at Phantom Ranch. We followed one another to school(s), and have walked through heartaches, celebrations, daily details of life, and developmental issues together with stronger shoulders than either one of us thought we posessed on our own. I think it's because, as they say, "two heads are better than one."

You have a way of grounding me and reminding me of the best version of who I am, a gift that I can't express my gratitude for. I'm so unbelievably proud of the woman that you are, and humbled by the gift that you are from God as a partner on my journey through life.

You, just as you are, are going to continue to do amazing things, and I can't wait to stand next to you and support you as you do them.

Happy Birthday, Emily.

Life Lessons

Some random guy named Jack posted his life lessons somewhere on the internet and some girl who was more than bored at work (me) stumbled upon them this morning. I don't know Jack, but I think he's on to something with these. This picture made me think, and made my morning.

Mud Pies

Now that I have time on my hands, I am fully aware of and embracing the fact that I simply do life better when I write. I think in the world that I often convince myself I live in, it feels as though my only option is to keep things to myself-solve my own problems, comfort myself, and quickly bring things to God, so that I can smile, move on, and keep on trucking. I spend a lot of time thinking, avoiding over-thinking, or talking myself into or out of things instead of just doing what feels right or real.

While I've had a fabulous and totally undeserved month of back to back awesomeness, traveling, eating, celebrating, and exploring, I haven't felt the most connected. I've been catching up with old friends, which is nice, but even with a great friend, this kind of communication tends to remain at a relatively superficial level. I wandered the streets of London, drowning in all of the glorious input, but too exhausted and content to do much outputting. And for many, many, hours of the past month, I've been lost in my own head-flying, wandering, driving, resting, cleaning, working, catching up...but none of this alone time has been used all that well, definitely not with the intention of sitting down to think, write, and reflect on some of the big unsolved mysteries that I feel looming like a rain cloud over my 24 year old life.

I learn more, feel better, live harder, love deeper, and fall on my knees in thankfulness and faith way more when I am in a habit of writing, praying, and communicating well. But, today, while I thought that what I needed was going to be an hour or two with my journal after an equally needed coffee with a great friend, turns out that hour and a half with her was more than enough.

I enjoy putting my own thoughts into a neat order on paper in order to feel better about them. This part of me loves to be in control. But sometimes I just need to hear from someone else a gentle "me too, that is exactly what it's like" to remind me that I'm doing just fine in this transitional-feeling time of life. It is highly unlikely that I'd just be able to sort it all out if I could only have enough time with a pen and paper. Instead I know that I would do well to rest in this place, to live out of and lean into this season of my life.

What I needed more than I knew today was a good old-fashioned coffee date with a woman I respect and enjoy. And that is exactly what I got. We sat at Good Cup while it rained outside and laughed. We have both just come off of what felt like a marathon month in our own ways, and we sat and shared thoughts and stories, encouraged, bitched, and laughed some more, all the while being straight up honest about the things that we have in common in life right now; things that can be tough and more often than not feel like the short end of the stick. We are both glass is half full type people who don't often enough seek out an occasion to receive encouragement from those around us when things feel a little sucky. We have a tendency to buck up, remind ourselves that our time will come, someday, that things will eventually all "fall into place and make sense." At 24 and 25 this illusive someday feels like it has everything tied up into it. But I was reminded again today that while waiting for someday is hard, it's a lot more fun when you take the time to step outside yourself and realize that you are not waiting alone. Not only are there other rad people waiting for someday with as much anticipation as I am, they are waiting with me here and now, and we're having a damn good time today.

When I walked back to my car, after the sun had come out, I thought about the kind of friends you have when you're little who would want to play in the mud with you when it rained, making mud pies. It's like that's what we were doing. We were sitting in the dirt and rain, which could very well have felt miserable. But we were using it to cheer one another up, cheer ourselves up, and remind ourselves that we're doing just fine; celebrating the lives that are ours to live and making some fun out of what we've got at the moment.

The Good Stuff

I've been a very bad blogger.

Hopefully now that the month of March is over and my non-stop journey from finals-to-London-to-Palm-Springs-back-to-school-to-hosting-visitors-to-Robin's-wedding is over, I'll find some time to breathe. To gather my thoughts.

In the meantime, a hodge podge list of some of the things that I've been loving and celebrating in their own rite over the past month:

• Acai bowls from Backyard Bowls. Oh my gosh. Since I discovered them, I think I go 3,4 times a week.
• Wicked. I saw it in London and when it ended I immediately wanted it to start again. It was kind of like Mamma Mia in that way. It was absolutely incredible.
• My new Theology and Culture class. Amazing professor, interesting subject, engaging conversation...you know it's a good class when 3 hours fly by and you could care less whether or not you get a break.
• The incredible, monochromatic art of Mark Tansey.
• Re-reading The Celebration of Discipline by Richard Foster, Cold Tangerines by Shauna Niequist, and Persuasion by Jane Austen. Having time to read (and re-read) for fun is a welcome new pasttime.
• The chickens. My friends got some chickens in hopes of farming their eggs. For some reason those little ladies make me so happy. Although it's been over a week and they still have yet to produce an egg, I love the thought of those boys doing everything in their power to make sure the chickens are comfortable and taken care of. It makes my day whenever I think about them building that coop, Saur and Micah getting them as a surprise, Griffin perching on his chair in there so they are comfortable with him, or Paul building and re-building a ramp so the lonely chicken would roost with all her buddies.
• Daylight savings. I love love love the extra hours of sunlight at the end of the day. That, combined with the fact that it's been warm enough to lay out at the beach here in SB. I can't complain.
• The Tower of London. As much as I'd like to be a good blogger who updates everyone on what I did over there, I'm not sure it'll happen. So I'd like to say that while it was one of my more touristy endeavors, I loved the Tower of London. With it's history, sordid past, interesting stories, crown jewels...
• I've said it before and I'll say it again. HGTV. I love it.
• George Strait being recognized by the ACM as Artist of the Decade and just sitting there, cool as ever in that hat, saying he ain't done yet. Keep on cranking out those number ones, George, and I'll keep buying them.
• Laying out by the pool in Palm Springs with a best friend for a last minute, much needed mini-vacation.
• Hump day dinners. My friends and I make dinner together on Wednesday nights. While we see each other plenty of other times during the week, and even share other meals together, there's something special about hump day dinner with those people. It is intentional community that feels more like family as we organize, prepare, pray for, and eat a meal together.
• Cadbury Flake bars from London. I'm not usually one to favor milk chocolate, but I brought home about 30 of these delicious, melt-in-your-mouth, slices of heaven and can't get enough of them.
• Farmer's market.
• Whale watching on the Double Dolphin with Captain Ron. Best ten dollars I ever spent. If any of you want to go, anytime, you let me know. I'm there.

Once I started listing, I became overwhelmed by how much I have to be thankful for at the moment. My mental list keeps growing, but, well, I'm at work and now I finally have something to work on. So I'll do the responsible thing and get to it.

Redemption Song

The Long's have finally tied the knot! Robin was, not surprisingly, a breath-taking bride who threw a fabulous and elegant celebration on Saturday. I would venture to say that I cry at most weddings I attend - I can't help myself. But on that gorgeous afternoon in the valley when Robin headed down the aisle eyes locked on Matt she just looked perfect, confident, and stunning. In that moment, with the sweet sound of Amazing Grace playing, the tears that escaped my eyes felt different than other wedding tears. They shared the same wedding tears purpose: perfect day, beautiful bride, groom's awe, celebration of love and commitment... but on Saturday I felt that I was on seriously holy ground, and knew beyond a shadow of a dobt that what I was witnessing was a truly sacred moment. Matt and Robin have a beautiful story, full of grace and redemption, with God's hand visibly behind their coming together. It was a beautiful and holy day, and I look forward to walking with them as God's good hand continues to bless their marriage.