Like Coming Home

A throwback to September 2005...
...And October 2008 at the Kougar's wedding...

I just got back from spending the weekend in Ashland, Oregon for Kacey's wedding. A college roommate and beloved friend, her friendship and the girls that come with it represent (and will always) what friendship at it's very best should be.

With Katie and Kylea, Kacey, Elyse, Hilary and Shannon, I am at home. I may not necessarily feel like Santa Barbara is home yet, or that Glenview is home anymore, nor do I even feel at home in my own skin sometimes...but with my friends I am home. They can make me laugh harder than anyone else, and we have walked through some of the toughest times of our lives together. They make sitting around in pajamas at 3 in the afternoon watching smutty tv with bottomless coffee cups seem like the most fun activity in the world, can eat with the best of 'em, dance, sing, cry, hug, tease, wake up early, joke, encourage, and take whipped cream shots like no one else I know. I can't believe it's been two years since we have all been together. Although we most definitely missed Shannon and all the Shannon-ness that she brings to the group, I could not have been happier to spend four days doing the things we do best, with the girls I do life best with.

As if my cup does not overflow already (right Hil?!) with these six characters, there are a handful of others who fill my heart with light and life and love, without whom I would not be completely who I am. And I needed to be reminded of that this week. Leaving Ashland, I was sad to see everyone heading in different directions to the different places we currently call home, but overwhelmed with gratitude at the fact that I get to keep Hil with me in Santa Barbara. While we are stretched across the map, and the times we get to spend all together are growing depressingly less frequent due to busy busy adult lives, I can see Hil pretty much whenever I want to, and for that piece of sanity I am increasingly thankful. I have fabulous roommates and friends in Santa Barbara and people like Becky who come to stay for long visits. When Becky comes it's like a 2 (or 3 or 5...) day party/therapy session. She knows me and listens to me and encourages me and speaks truth into my life like very few others are capable of. And there's Emily. The old faithful, despite the fact that the majority of our friendship has been done distance style, we have always made one another a priority. The way she views the world and the passion she has for life and what she will do with it and the love she shows to those around her are just a couple of items on the long list of things I admire about her. Taking full advantage of my long commute to and from school, I have rarely been as thankful for my cell phone as I was on Tuesday, as we were able to talk as if we were not in different time zones and be present in the big and small things of our adult lives in ways that matter.

This week, I am overwhelmed with gratitude for these friendships.

I could not imagine life without them, but am pleased that I do not have to. Because life without them is just not an option. These friends, these mirrors and roots and shoulders to cry on and comedians to rely on are as much a part of me as my own hands and feet and heart.